Searching for an errant dummy the other day and was looking under the toddler's wardrobe. Whilst I lay prone on the floor I noticed that the wardrobe's legs were swollen, as though the furniture had gout. On closer inspection they were sort of crumbling and needed replacing. So they were duly replaced by stout metal legs - no chance of furniture gout in these puppies. I was somewhat philosophical; the wardrobe was from Ikea and whilst quite smart looking it was pretty inexpensive. So, you know, you get what you pay for.
But it got me to thinking about Ikea, specifically the layout of their shops. They provide a very disconcerting shopping experience - you're forced around the store in a particular order and shown their furniture and accessories in a series of tableau in which you are given visions of how Ikea's wares would fit in 'so well' into your own home. Only after you've been been through this theme-park-ride of a shop are you allowed to actually get you hands onto the stuff you want to buy. And having seen how charming that picture of the 'driftwood on tropical beach' looks in a living room or office space, you just pick one up from the dozens in the warehouse without thinking. It's clever, in an insidious, Mooney sort of way. Knowing all this does help shield you from the worst of the hard sales technique.
As does a little tip that I read. There are no obvious shortcuts - you have to follow a set path as though you were on rails (again, rather like that theme perk ride). But, if you were to look behind you, you would see the little cut-throughs that the staff presumably use. Again I find this somewhat creepy, as though just behind you lurks a parallel Ikea.
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